Waiting for the Sun to Shine

 Right now is a hard time for me. I've always found late March difficult. I'm sick of endless winter, and having to wear turtle necks, heavy socks, sweaters, and my frumpy housecoat. Seeing clumps of dirty snow has me craving Spring's sweet arrival. 

Meanwhile, the family is settling in. We're establishing routines, and sorting things out together. And because of my son's enthusiasm and tenacity, we now have Starlink in its beta stage, so that's upped our online experience in a big way.

Renovations have begun: electrical upgrade, plumbing, insulation, some new windows, a heat pump, much of this eligible for generous rebates. I've also splurged on a bathroom upgrade, complete with a bathtub where I will relax at the end of each day. 

But at this moment my place is a train wreck: walls torn out, tools everywhere, bathroom stuff all over the place -- not to mention my ever dwindling bank account. And sharing a bathroom with a family of four.

And the boxes! Some dear friends from Victoria will soon be moving here. How is it that renovictions are allowed during a pandemic? They've already sent their stuff, and boxes of it fill my living area. They take up a lot of room, but remind me that our friends will soon be on their way! 

I'm yearning for their company. Since Keith and I parted ways, it hurts. It's like having a wounded animal inside. It was for the best, but I feel badly that he's lost his COVID bubble. We phone each other sometimes to check in, and give each other moral support. At least it wasn't cruel and ugly.

Spring, just around the corner, is a promise of better things to come: warmer weather, growing a food forest, seeing the plants that volunteer, renovations completed, friends arriving, and hopefully a sunnier outlook. 

But right now is the time of slogging through the groundwork, and building the foundation for the comfort and beauty of what is to come.

Underneath it all, I'm grateful. For my family, for getting to be part of my grandkids' lives, for our dog and cat, and for our luck at finding amazing trades people to fix up our house. The walk into town is lovely, and the local grocery store sells organic produce and lots of other great stuff. And what could be better than sharing this experience with my family and friends?

I'm grateful for the spectacular beauty of this land, and am aware that it is on traditional Sinixt territory. By being good stewards, by giving this land our love and respect, and by restoring it with others, will we help to address the debt we owe to those who were dispossessed of their land and way of life? I wish I knew what to do.

We bought this property from a Doukhobor family. Doukhobors are known for their commitment to peace and hard work among other things. Can we fit in and be worthy neighbours? 

What does this land ask of us? Will we listen? I hope that we're able to find right relationship with each other, our neighbours, our community, and the land that sustains us. What a privilege it is to try.

In these crazy times, I can't think of anywhere else I'd rather be.

Held

 It's been close to a month now that my one bedroom suite has been home to my son and his family, which has now expanded to four.

My grandson was born before his mid-November due date, and he and his Mom are both healthy and strong.

We recently took possession of our new home in Winlaw.

Both of our houses have sold, and I have until at least Winter Solstice to move out of my old place, which will make packing and cleaning much more leisurely. And we'll all have a place to stay in Nelson until then.

It's felt like we've been living in a combination fish bowl pressure cooker. Think small one bedroom, one bathroom, four adults, a precocious four year old and a newborn. Earlier this year I painted all the rooms in the house after thirteen years of not having either time or money. And I'm a neat freak. 

Despite this, we've felt held and supported by our community. I've stayed at Keith's at night in case my son and granddaughter need the extra bed where I had been sleeping. It also gave us some quiet time. And he's been helping me move my things to the new house, and cooking meals while I clean and pack.

We've been treated with kindness and professionalism by my realtor, the woman who sold us the property, trades people, the credit union and our lawyer's office. I've also had the support of the City of Nelson's EcoSave program co-ordinator who has been generous with her expertise and time in helping me navigate the programs in place that will help us to green and upgrade the house we bought. I'll blog about these in more detail later.

As a family we want to garden and to grow berries and fruit trees, and make our house beautiful and energy efficient. And it couldn't be a better time to green our home. There is so much support right now for this from the City, and the provincial and federal governments.

Spending time in our home in Winlaw is like entering a different, much slower time zone. Trees, wild turkeys, kids and pets ground me and set the pace.

The neighbours we've met are lovely people. They let us know where to get firewood, and how the water systems work, among other things.

When I go into town to clean and pack my old house, I can tune in to the weekly satsang at the Ashram where I used to work. Like many others, I had to leave my job due to the pandemic. It's so nice to see old friends and sing along.

Even though I'm slogging through a big move, I'm grateful for how held I feel.